A Debatable Post

I've been in room messing around on the computer for about an hour now trying to decide whether or not I wanted to post a new blog or not. I started this adventure with every intention of documenting our lives...the good, bad and the ugly. But the truth is, no one wants to read or be reminded about a bad day. Especially the types of bad days that have absolutely no rhyme nor reason as to why they're bad. Today is a perfect example of one of those days. The weather was beautiful. My children and I finished up their classroom Valentine's and we even had some friends come over to play. I felt particularly adventurous this afternoon (although looking back I have NO idea why) and took my 5 kids and their buddy to the playground. It was a blast watching everyone have such a great time! This was the first time the babies had been able to actually get out and play! They are adorable! At least they were until it was time to go...I had to carry Addeline like a sack of potatoes to the car SCREAMING at the top of her lungs while the remaining 5 children peacefully walked behind me. There were 3 people that rose to their feet and actually turned their bodies in my direction to witness the spectacle!!! After I had harnessed the still screaming monster in her seat (by this time Kaitlyn has realized what's going on and has joined in on the scream fest) I just sat down on the curb with my head in my hands feeling completely defeated. The rest of the day was not a total bust, as the girls got a good nap, the big kids got more outside time and we all played the wii!! So at 8:30 when everyone was tucked tightly into bed I tried to ponder on why exactly this day will go down in history as one of those days. My conclusion, as wimpy as it may be, is that I am just missing my best friend. I know I should be stronger and I often put on that "brave" face, but sometimes it's gotta be okay to take the mask off. So here goes...My name is Ashley Roy...I am completely smitten with my husband and I'm just feeling so lost without him.